While I was washing Blitzen’s hair last night (she really likes me to do this so I do), we had the following conversation:
Blitzen, “Carrie, I really don’t want you go on any more trips.”
Carrie, “Is it hard for you when I am gone?”
Blitzen, “Yes, I start to forget you a little bit and I just want you to come home.”
Carrie, “I know that must be scary and lonely. But I’ve always come back and I’m always going to come back. You know that, right?”
Blitzen, “Yes, I know but I still just want you to stay with me.”
Carrie, “Well, I want to stay with you too but I have to go sometimes for my job. Next year, I think I will have to travel a little bit less.”
Blitzen, “I think you were gone 17 times this year.”
Carrie, “17 days?”
Blitzen, “No, 17 trips.”
Carrie, “I don’t think it is quite that many – should we try to remember them and count them up?” I counted and got to five.
Blitzen, “I am pretty sure you are missing some — it has been 17.”
Carrie, “Ok, well, I definitely will not go on 17 trips next academic year. I promise.”
So, in addition to the fact that my kid is seriously the cutest – I mean, really, just admit my kid is the cutest. This conversation would not have happened one year ago – it couldn’t have. Blitzen would not have been capable of identifying, let alone articulating, these feelings. And she was so calm as she explained this to me. None of the trauma behavior came out – she just wanted to tell me how she felt. And she did and it was awesome.