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Posts Tagged ‘friends’

First day of camp, awesome. Second day of camp, in the world according to Blitzen, was a lot like the Game of Thrones (which I do not watch but I read the books).  Apparently, there was a plot coordinated by the friends that she made day one because she was popular – there was a kiddie coup, I suppose, in Blitzen’s brain.  They apologized and asked for forgiveness — she is considering it but doesn’t think they really deserve it so she might just make new friends.  People, there are only like 30 kids in her age group at this camp, I am getting nervous she is going to burn through all possible playmates in the first week. And I am also (even at girl drama filled age 11_ concerned that so much of this is just about Blitzen’s negative spin and terrible self-image.

I really really really wish that Blitzen did not assume that every single human(dog, cat, bird, squirrel, taxi and stoplight) that she encounters is out to get her, make her life miserable, take everything that she has, control everything, steal everything, cheat and lie about EVERYTHING. I understand why she feels this way – it is actually a fairly sane reaction given the world that she lived in up until Nov of 2011.  I am sad ’cause I think that she might always feel this way and life is just better and easier if you can, once in awhile, assume the best of others instead of the worst.

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Blitzen had a sleepover the other evening – went off without a hitch.  We told the girls that they could watch tv and we went to bed.

We awoke in the morning and went out into the living room to find a little nest of blankets and pillows had been built, 2 darling children were passed out on the floor, the room scattered with the remnants of snacks and 2 cut crystal wine glasses filled with capri sun.  That is living it up, right there. I wish I had taken a photo, it was the perfect picture of an 11 year old’s idea of a decadent time.

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Andrew called and said, “What are you guys up to?”  I replied, “Buying vampire teeth, of course, what are you doing?”

We had an old friend from St. Louis in town for the weekend.  She has a lot of dietary allergies and so Andrew had been researching restaurants and had found one that we love that would be happy to accommodate her requests.  It is a very very very fancy italian restaurant and they said that they could do their pasta gluten-free.  But it is very fancy and expensive.

Andrew, “So, you want to come out to dinner?” Me, “With Blitzen? There?”

So I asked Blitzen, “Would you like to go a very fancy restaurant with Andrew and our friend? It will take a very long time, they are going to bring us a lot of different foods, we’re going to have sit for a long time.”

Blitzen considered this, “I’ll try-y-y-y it.”

Some highlights:

Blitzen peering down a marble staircase to the ‘basement’ and saying – “Why do they have all that beer in the basement.” That would be the wine cellar, honey.

Blitzen, upon being presented with the 4th of 5 courses, leaning over to me and saying, “Why do they keep bringing us food? I just don’t get it.”

Me, pointing to something on Blitzen’s plate and saying, “That is roasted cauliflower, you know.” And Blitzen saying, “Yes!” and literally grabbing several fingerful to stuff in her mouth.  Who can be bothered with cutlery when roasted vegetables are available.

Blitzen going to the coatcheck because she “needed” something.  Blitzen being ratted out by the coatcheck guy, “I remember you, you came by here an hour ago for the candy in your mom’s bag.”  ‘Cause she’s peckish, I guess, in the middle of our 5 courses.

Blitzen was engaged in the conversation and the food.  It was a marathon and amazing meal – more than 2 hours of wonderful food. She was patient and polite and stayed in her seat except when she went to 1) go see if she could find the pianist 2) went to look at a vase up close that she was pretty sure was shaped like the statue of liberty 3) went outside to see if it had started to snow.

And she only wore her vampire teeth between courses!

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This year, Blitzen had a gymnastics themed birthday party.  She loved it.  I wish I could post the slow-motion movie her babysitter took of her on the trampoline – twisting, turning and doing the splits in mid-air.  She is really something.

Many people from her family of origin came to the event including her parents, her siblings, several cousins, one grandma and an uncle.  They all traveled a very long way on public transit on a terrible weather day.  I was glad that they came. Blitzen really wanted them there. She did a wonderful job melding her worlds – us, school friends and their parents, all her family.

There were several wonderful and funny moments to the party.

It had been 2 weeks since the kids had seen each other because of the winter recess.  And as each new girl arrived, the whole pack of them would squeal and hug.  I told one of the moms that it reminded me a 20 year high school reunion – they were so genuinely delighted to see each other.  And Blitzen blurted out, “You’ve all grown so much!”  which is something that she had heard several times during our vacation over the break.

When everyone sat down for pizza, the theme song from Frozen came on.  If you have never seen an impromptu concert with 10 ten year olds and 1 eleven year old belting out that song, then you have not yet lived.  It was hilarious.

At one point, Blitzen’s oldest brother got quite sad.  One of Blitzen’s friends rushed up to her to draw her attention to the situation so Blitzen went right over to him, to reassure him and to pat his back.

Her cake was very very pink with a little sparkly icing and beautiful little purple flowers just as she requested. Apparently, when she and Andrew went to the bakery to order it, she was quite specific about the color and design.  And it turned out fabulous.

At the end of the event, Blitzen was totally cool, no sadness, no meltdown.  I told her it was time for folks to go so she went around giving everyone their goody bag and thanking them for coming to her party.  She was a superb hostess.

 

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We had a really great weekend with friends.  It was a good thing – we needed a break from our angst and drama. A change of scenery and people sometimes is a miraculous thing.  Blitzen and company made lovely little ‘gingerbread’ houses. It was a group activity, Blitzen listened to the instructions but she didn’t quite understand some of the finer details of house construction.   She did not flip out – she just called me over and said, “Carrie, I don’t get it.” So I explained in a different way, gave just a wee bit of assistance and she was on her way.  And she put more candy on the house than in her stomach and then went to the snack table to eat a hard boiled egg and some cheddar cheese. Blitzen's gingerbread house

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We visited with some old friends this weekend.  We hadn’t seen them in about a year.

It is always exciting to get together with friends, it is a rare treat these days.  And it is always exciting to watch Blitzen with people and to see how much she has grown.  Our friends commented on how mature and calm she was.  The highlight of the day (which included a visit to some formal gardens with space to run and an old mansion – no running but cool stuff –  as well as a lengthy meal at a grownup restaurant) was when Blitzen calmly said, “Excuse me, Carrie, when you are done with your conversation with E, may I talk to her?”  Why of course you can, my darling girl.  And thank you for asking so nicely instead of pulling on my arm and shouting, “Let’s talk about mermaids!”

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Blitzen had quite a list of things to accomplish this summer and we did it all.

Coney Island

Disneyland

Host cousin H in NYC for week

Fly to Arizona with cousin H all by themselves (this was edited – Blitzen and cousin H flew a day to AZ a day before us with my mother who sat in the row behind the two very independent 10 year olds and pretended not to know them)

Visit in Az and swim, swim, swim

Go to gymnastics camp

Take surf lessons

Start a family seashell collection

Swim in a lake

Ride in a convertible

The last 2 items just got in under the wire.  We rented a convertible for the last weekend of summer, took the scenic route up to Mohonk Mountain where we spent hours diving into the lake as well as hanging out in row boats, playing shuffleboard, eating fancy meals and dancing our hearts out to a live band.

It was action packed, I tell. What a great summer!

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